Peter Bergman Theater Reviews

The story in brief: Widow Trott sends her son Jack off to sell Bossy the cow for nothing less than five gold pieces so that they can eat and pay the mortgage. Not too bright, and overly fond of the cow I must say, Jack sells her, instead, for five magic beans to Simple Simon, an organic farmer whose daughter Jill takes a fancy to Jack. Jack’s beans grow quickly into a giant beanstalk at the top of which Jack discovers the home of the mortgage holders Fanny Mae and Freddy Mac, two giants in the field. Slyer and much more clever than thought to be, Jack manages to wrangle freedom from the oppression of the subprime loan for his mother and at the same time he finds a way to spend his life with his beloved cow.
Add to this simple story parody lyrics to 16 familiar tunes — most of them — and you have the basic material of the show. One element that makes this a favorite of audiences is the often ad-libbed quips about the current events of the day, primarily political, and you have the text of what was, on opening night, a one hour and fifteen minute one-act miracle of silliness, audience participation and high lowdown comedy.
The cast is, as always, a treat. Many Ghent Playhouse regulars are assembled again, most playing characters of the opposite sex, in the most hilarious costumes Joanne Maurer has ever created for this gang. They play on a practical and magical set designed by Rick Rowsell and are gorgeously lit by Bill Camp. Paul Leyden, as Sweety Pieman, plays the downstage piano, acts, sings and dances a duet. Nothing more could be asked of him, especially in the funny hat and smock he wears.
Sally McCarthy is a personable Jack. Her careful “Equus” gestures toward Bossy, the cow, are as delightful as her singing and her flirting with both disaster in the clouds and romance on the ground. As her beloved cow, Rick Rowsell makes milking a merry mixture of mayhem and mystery. If you can’t get blood out of a stone, believe me, you can’t squeeze milk out of this brashly male bovine mammal. Equus lives in this couple’s relationship.
Paul Murphy is Dame Foxy Trott, Jack’s mom, and if you don’t recognize her forebears from her wig you will from her wink and her sexy attacks on the elk steaks you’ll hear about. Political parody presides. Murphy is at his best here. Dame Trott does just that and without a canter to distract her from her goals. Simon, her vis-a-vis, is played by Judy Staber, who originated the whole Panto movement in Columbia County. Portly, mustachioed, pontificating yet mobile, Staber’s Simon is endearing and makes a wonderful addition to her other classic characters: Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother and Rumpelstiltskin. She also leads the world in “The Cucumber Song” (the words are in the program, so there’s no excuse for sitting this out).
Cathy Lee-Vischer and Johnna Murray are Fannie Mae and Freddy Mac, with just a little bow to both Margaret Hamilton and the current home-building/conversion craze. If the Jolly Green Giant is your idol, or even Mr. Clean, wait till you get a look at these two. They are funny, scary and even more to the point than Kermit the frog would be. Among their many possessions in this play are Harpie, a golden harp, played by director Detwiler, and Goldie Goose, the egg-layer, played by Joanne Maurer. Detwiler is hilarious in high heels, Marlene Dietrich gold legs, and a certain air of musical genius not seen since Liberace departed this world. Maurer is brilliant as she lays those eggs on command and chirps in a hawkish, mawkish manner.
Ron Harrington plays Jill in his best ingenue/soubrette fashion. His blonde curls and his big flirty eyes make him the perfect heroine, and his way with a clever turn-of-phrase is unique and unforgettable. He can even make a comment about a cow into something less than discreetly sexual and yet allow it to remain innocent at the same time.
Musical high points in this latest entertainment were “Up the Beanstalk” a well-known ABBA song, “Start Walkin’,” “Jack’s Lament” (an Irving Berlin you won’t forget), “Bye Bye Bush Beans,” and Jill’s solo, “A Girl Like Me.”
The Ghent Playhouse production only runs on weekends and ends its all-too-brief run on Dec. 14. Is the show for families? Absolutely, but be prepared to explain a few things about the sexual confusion that reigns supreme in the pantomime tradition. Judy Staber’s program notes will help. These shows tend to sell out, so run, do not walk, to the nearest telephone and indulge in a holiday tradition that is too good to be true.

“Jack and the Beanstalk” plays at the Ghent Playhouse Fridays and Saturdays at 8 p.m. and Sundays at 2 p.m. through Dec. 14. Tickets range from $8-$15. The Ghent Playhouse is located at the corner of Route 66 and Town Hall Place in Ghent, N.Y. For information or tickets, call the box office at 518-392-6264.

J. Peter Bergman sleeps in Pittsfield, but spends his days with poet Edna St. Vincent Millay in Austerlitz. For more of his reviews, check out advocateweekly.com or his own Web site, berkshirebrightfocus.com.